happiness

Why It Actually Pays To Be Happy

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Do you ever wonder why positive and upbeat people always gets up the ladder way faster than the rest? Is it the magic of smooching up to someone or is there inherently something special that happen to people who are generally happier? I’m not talking about those who are good at hiding their negative emotions. I’m referring to those people who go through life knowing they experience emotional ups and downs and still manage to stay happy.

Something bad can happen one day and they somehow are able to find their stillness. They carry a certain quality of calmness that makes tough situations seem less stressful.

Does this remind you of a certain someone in your circle, or maybe at work? Maybe there’s a teeny-tiny-bit of discomfort that you just can’t seem to “vibing” at their level… what is their secret?

I am talking about the people who are truly, genuinely, and authentically radiating happiness from the inside and on every single level. You can’t help but admit that it’s a little irritating how they just got life figured out for them, and at the same time you’re dying to know where they find their bliss.

They seem to make friends everywhere they go, they are great conversationalists, people tend to fall in love with them and be friends with them within a short amount of time, and they get the best service everywhere they go. It’s no wonder why they seem to enjoy life on a different level. And when they have bad times, they’re the first ones to get support pouring in and people rushing to help from every corner.

What do they have that I don’t?

I was in that position a few years back — I worked at a global advertising firm as an intern. I assumed all the interns were treated the same. We were all hand picked from reputable universities and have high GPAs. But reality soon hit me that it was not the case, and that work place does favor those who are happier.

Maybe “happy” is too broad to describe this fellow junior colleague of mine. She was smart, articulate, energetic, intellectual and hardworking… to be fair, I think I lived up to the same descriptions too, or at least I thought so. The only difference was, she seemed popular and that made me jealous.

You see, trying to portraying yourself as happy and being authentically happy are completely different things. Watching her thrive, I learnt to adapt my behavior to prove myself. I became a little friendlier, added a little humor, started small talk a little more, and also rushed to offer my help to other colleagues at every opportunity. But all of this “effort” was coming from a place in my heart known as jealousy.

Ironically, the harder I tried, the more popular she became. It seemed like my energy was pushing people away and I felt it even added to her likability. She started receiving bigger responsibilities and soon was promoted before I even heard about the opportunity. People wanted to hang around her, and naturally her growth skyrocketed along with her confidence.

Fast forward a couple of years, she is raised to managerial level and has been transferred to multiple other offices for exchange. To say that her career has been “smooth sailing” is an understatement. After seeing one of her new Linkedin updates a small voice entered my head. It was a sudden realisation after having compared myself to her success for so many years — I realised that I had not done my fair share of self-development. And in order for life to give you a reward, you first need to invest in embodying the qualities of a person who is likely to receive it. This realisation opened up my mind to a whole new perspective.

Get your glow on

To me, that means bringing your best energy to work and life every single day. It means not giving in to the power of negativity when things go wrong. It means assuming other people mean well and have the best intentions. It means turning your challenges into creativity energy. It means taking your ideas to the next level because you are inspired.

We all want to increase material wealth or climb the ladder of success in some form. Instead of focusing on the outcome, we must first lay the groundwork which makes up 99% of the effort. This is the internal part, or I’d like to call “behind the scenes” where nobody sees, before everything manifests itself as a result.

So if you want to achieve sustainable growth in your income and happiness, start by bringing the attention back to self care. When you are willing to work out the difficult parts internally, you are able to remove all distraction that affects your attention and intention. Only then can you develop laser focus and bring yourself to operate at the highest level. 

In the place of genuine happiness, that’s where you can radiate an infinite beam to shine light up those around you. That is where true wealth begins.

Breaking Up With Guilt Around Money

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Have you ever questioned yourself if pursuing more wealth and money is the "noble" thing to do? Are you afraid of being accused of "greed" when you chose the option makes you more money? Have you been told that you “don't deserve it". Have you held back from celebrating your own success because you thought it might make your family feel bad, because they did not manage to reach those achievements themselves?


Who are we kidding? Is it not right to take care of ourselves? Is it not right to make sure we can afford a roof over our heads and have food on the table? Better yet, isn’t it a great thing to be able to take care of others from the wealth that we create? To spread love, help others, or contribute to causes that we support? Unfortunately, not everyone seems to agree. You may be experiencing guilt from the hardwired internal dialogue, or punishing yourself for feeling great because you know the rest of your family hadn’t done so well in the past.


I know the word "guilt" used here is a powerful word, and I’m not trying to make things look pretty. Because we’ve brushed it under the carpet with our best efforts to not deal with it, only for it to accumulate that manifests in more money problems and heartbreak in the end. It’s an emotion that we experience deeply even though some of us don't even realise or acknowledge the presence of that feeling. It’s the moment that doesn’t feel right knowing you have to give up something you truly value to pursue an opportunity that pays better. Or it’s that discomfort about receiving more money because you believe you deserve less. Well, let’s talk about it.

A lot of us are stuck in this dilemma. On one hand we want to get more money out of our time – so that we can achieve our financial goals faster. On the other hand our mind interrogates ourselves asking us if we really deserve to achieve financial wealth on a higher level. This common scenario shows how our subconsciousness plays a big part in talking ourselves out of achieving true bliss, alignment, and happiness when it comes to making more money. It's so powerful that sometimes we manage to find reasons to get out of the opportunity that gives us more monetary reward.

To understand why this happens and untangle these feelings, we need to look into the self-talk that takes place when guilt kicks in. It comes up in many ways. They most commonly show up as dialogues like:

"I grew up in a family where we've always struggled with money, and now I feel ashamed to share my accomplishments with them"

"I feel like I'm not giving enough value to receive this much in return" or,

"I don't have the qualifications to be charging or being paid this much" or,

"Making this level of income means I might miss out important milestone moments of seeing my baby grow up"


Scripts like these will keep replaying in your head in the background. We all do a good job putting away our emotions in the day. We'll roll it into a ball and stuff it into our pockets. But the moment you quiet down these familiar voices make their way back into your head again, and they remind you that they're here to stay. They disguise themselves as being our "truths".


So you've allowed the guilt sit around for longer than you wished and it's finally time to call them out because it's not leading you anywhere. The best way and only way is to be at peace with your feelings and your inner self talk. In the beginning they were here to remind you to live with integrity and be the best possible version of yourself. They have served their purpose, and it's time to channel guilt into purposeful, useful energy. 


Know that there are many ways to be in touch with your emotions and receive a lot of money without feeling guilty. Know that you can associate your work to feelings of pride, passion and satisfaction. Know that the influence and impact you bring onto the world deserves much more credit than you allow yourself to receive. 


Know that by breaking up with guilt, you're releasing yourself from your limitations and false beliefs, so that you can finally enjoy the bliss of having abundance that's been waiting for you.